Friday, August 27, 2010

A BaconHead You Can't Blame On Someone Else


Those who have commented on da most recent daTruthSquad blog have spoken, and their words have been heard. It has become abundantly clear that not only has da alliance between da Manalapan Democrats and GOP'ers has folded like a cheap suit - at da hands of da GOP'ers who not only dumped da Queen at da side of da road with no cab fare, but also made da Capo di Tutti Capi, da boss of all bosses Gerry "One Bourbon, One Shot & One Beer" Ward look like even more of an amateur leader than Adam "PuPu"Puharic was when he almost ran da Monmouth GOP'ers into da ground.

Here are some of da comments left by some of our faithful TruthTellers:

1. "What a total disgrace Green turned out to be. Let's see what other info they didn't mention as Mayor Spodak looks further into Green's and his wife's closet. Come clean Green!"

2. "You say "The fact that Ryan Green's wife provides for his Health Care benefits does not matter." It does matter Ryan Green tried to mislead the public with a political stunt that backfired on him, sorry his integrity is now gone. A Proud Manalapan Republican."

3. "Did he or didn't he disclose the fact that he was getting free health care from the State of NJ from his wife's plan, during the time he was demonizing Roth for choosing to take her Health Care from the Township ? if so..he is a phoney..plain and simple.. And since when is it the Clerk's job to make sure that he fills a form out correctly ? is he an educated adult or a kindergarten student. Is he reviewing Township documents, contracts etc..God help us."

4. "Unless the township hired Madaam Cleo as their Clerk, how would she know what his personal information is ? Thats why it's called a disclosure form, you need to enter personal information how the heck is the Clerk supposed to know he already has free health care ? Don't blame the little people for his Big Oops."

5. "Good that Spodak exposed the sneakiness of Big Oops Green. They should have run Joey D who wouldn't be sneaky in filling out forms. They really messed up running Big oops Green now how can anyone trust him? Joey D you can trust. Big oops was a big mistake."

6. "If Ryan Green is to stupid to fill out his OWN important documents how can the residents of Manalapan trust him with township business? He was clearly a jackass for blaming the Manalapan Township clerk for his pre school I.Q. incompetence. I'm very disappointed to learn this and now he has no choice but to resign. He tried to mislead the residents and blamed a hard working public servant for his own non disclosure. "Lyin Ryan" I agree with everyone else and should step down."

We think you get da idea here. DaTruth is, Ryan "Big OOPS" Green making a mistake on his financial disclosure form isn't earth-shattering and isn't something that he should have to resign over - and we will not demand his resignation. Everybody makes mistakes, even lawyers, and we should know. However, as someone who works in da education field, what kind of role model are you when you make a mistake, and blame it on a senior citizen clerk who just retired and wasn't even there to defend herself -- and -- more important -- it wasn't even her job to know his personal finances or even go over his legal documents!

This is very simple - you make a mistake, cowboy up and admit you made a mistake. It should not have to take a silver-haired former mayor with a silver shovel to dig this up and call you out on it, and then instead of thanking that senior citizen, you blame another senior citizen for your mistakes that you still haven't fully owned up to.

To be fair, in his defense, maybe Big OOPS Ryan is living in "Green-land?" How was it da fault of da former Township Clerk to know what your financial situation is? Is it da fault of your accountant if you get a speeding ticket? If your child skins their knee at a playground, is that da fault of your veterinerian?

If anything, his financial disclosure mea culpa has only made da situation worse, but not just for him. By standing by his right-hand man, now Mayor Lord Andy Boy gets a front-row seat to Big OOPS's problems. And, with election day just over 60 days away, it is a possibility that Big OOPS's problems could become Andy Boy's problems.

Now, if this weren't a potential headache for Mayor Lord Andy Boy, another headache will be da Democrats. Considering how da alliance crumbled to dust, they are about as unhappy as a hen in a fox house. And, they have good reason to want to work harder than they ever have to derail Andy Boy's election hopes.

Now, of course there were other ways our August BaconHead Award winner could have handled this situation. With that in mind, here's daTruthSquad's Top-10 excuses that Ryan "Big OOPS" Green did not use in regards to his recent mea culpa:

10: "The dog ate my financial disclosure form."
9. "Oh, you mean the State of New Jersey is serious about this financial disclosure stuff?"
8. "Wait, Michelle Roth isn't the former Township Clerk? Did I blame the wrong person?"
7. "I knew I would be in trouble when I first put my financial disclosure form in my 50-gallon trash can and Waste Management orange-tagged my trash can and left the form in there."
6. "Damn rassin-frassin silver shovel carrying pain in my @#$%^& &$#!"
5. "If Mayor Spodak were a member of the Yorktowne Club this would never have happened."
4. "I should have taken da advice of my handlers and blamed Susan Cohen or daTruthSquad for all of this."
3. "No problem. I'll just have the Manalapan Legal Dream Team send out a subpoena and handle everything. They did such a great job in the Moskovitz lawsuit."
2. "Hopefully this won't come up when I run for President."
1. "Wow. I thought that members of the Manalapan Township Committee were legally allowed to break da rules."


And Andy Boy and "Come Clean" Green thought that Garbage-Gate was the worst thing they'd need to worry about.

DaTruth is, "Financial Disclosure-Gate" could become a big problem for Mayor Andy Boy's reelection bid. Hypothetically speaking, how will da fine folks at Covered Bridge feel when they are told by da Manalapan Democrats about a senior citizen retiring clerk being blamed for Big OOPS's big oops. Add this to da "Pearl Harbor" job the GOP'ers did to the alliance with the Manalapan Democrats which caught them completely off guard, and the gloves will surely be coming off when the election battle really begins.

Da question is, with two candidates you wouldn't know if you tripped over them, and not much time to get their campaign even started, how will da Manalapan Democrats generate any buzz for their candidates and attempt to derail Mayor Andy Boy's "shoo-in" election chances?

And, what a great lesson someone who works in the public education field (at taxpayer expense) is giving da youth of our great nation --- It's OK to make a mistake, but if you do, be sure to blame it on some "old" person who just retired and is not there to defend themselves. Your parents must be proud.

So, congratulations - for you not only made a mistake on your financial disclosure form, for which we would have given you a free pass on, but your "deflect & accuse" put the blame on a senior citizen clerk who just retired and wasn't even there to defend herself! You may have inadvertantly opened up a Pandora's Box of trouble for da guy on your left, Mayor Andy Boy. For reaching a new low and blaming a senior citizen for your own mistakes, da August winner of da coveted BaconHead Award is none other than Ryan "Big OOPS" (aka: "Lyin Ryan" and "Come Clean") Green!

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

BREAKING NEWS: "Disclosure-Gate" Is Da Latest Manalapan Town Hall Fiasco

DaTruthSquad must first admit that lately we have had some serious headaches that we almost had to seek out an expert physician. There were two reasons we didn't make that doctor's appointment - (1) We weren't sure whether our insurance was being picked up by a spouse that works for da state or by da township, and (2) we figured out da root cause of da headaches - unbelievably but true, daTruthSquad found ourselves in total agreement with da Queen on an issue for da first time since Truman was President!

It was daTruthSquad that first told our readers about da breakdown and da dissolving of da four year "alliance" between Mayor Andy Boy (Lord Lucas) and former Mayor da Queen, at da hands of Lord Lucas and his "Gray" handlers. We told you that da Queen would not go quietly into da night and allow this to go unpunished, especially during an election year where when da alliance was in play, da Democrats through their Capo di Tutti Capi put up two virtual unknowns to match up against da Yorktown Club's finest.

Remember, we told you this would happen!

Call this a "Spodak Moment" - In a stunning turn of events that da local snoozepaper has completely missed, da Queen, thanks to a silver tongued shovel toting card carrying Democrat has unearthed information that could play an embarrassing and significant role in da upcoming election - and we told you first this would happen.

In what was definitely "Must See Manalapan TV," Manalapan Committeeman Ryan "Big Oops" Green admitted before da Manalapan Township Committee and also to anyone in attendance or who was watching MTTV that he apparently botched his all-important financial disclosure form, a duty that all Manalapan Township Committee elected officials MUST submit!

In his own words, "Big Oops" said during da meeting, "A resident referenced my financial disclosure form. There was an oversight on my form. When I originally submitted the form at the request of the township clerk I asked it be glanced over to make sure it was in compliance. Turns out it wasn't. My wife's financial info was also not on there. As soon as it was brought to my attention I updated the form and resubmitted it."

And you thought crossing Route 9 (a state-maintained highway despite da thoughts of some on da Manalapan Township Committee) against da traffic light was bad!

But wait TruthTellers - it get's worse! Let's delve into what "Big Oops" said.

ISSUE 1: "There was an oversight on my form"

What "Big Oops" fails to tell us was exactly what da "oversight" was. Was it one thing? Did he not sign it? Did it involve a Swiss Bank account? Were there donations to da "Obama-Biden 2008 Campaign?"

ISSUE 2: "When I originally submitted the form at the request of the township clerk I asked it be glanced over to make sure it was in compliance"

When "Big Oops" made his mea culpa, he didn't blame himself, or gremlins, or da spirit of his late Uncle Truthie. He instead blamed da fact he left something off his disclosure statement on da Manalapan Township Clerk!

Oh, so let us get this straight --- in da eyes of at least one person, it's da job of da Manalapan Township Clerk to proofread all of our personal and private family documents for accuracy. Does this mean if daTruthSquad runs for Manalapan Township Committee next year and wins, then will it be da job of da Manalapan Township Clerk to proofread this blog for spelling and grammer errors?

What's next -- will it become da job of da Manalapan Township Clerk to give committeepeople haircuts so they look good on MTTV? Is it da job of da Manalapan Township Clerk to apply da Queen's makeup before meetings too? Will she soon be giving Mayor Andy Boy manicures and pedicures before each meeting?

If we follow Ryan "Big Oops" Green's logic, then one can assume that it will become da job of Tara Tiara to take out da Town Hall building trash. Even worse, da Town Clerk wasn't even at da meeting to defend herself! So, in effect, he blamed someone who cannot defend herself and most likely never saw this one coming.

And, by da way, how is da Manalapan Township Clerk supposed to know about intimate details about da financial well-being of one "Big Oops?"

ISSUE 3: "My wife's financial info was also not on there"

Is this something else he may or may not have left off his financial disclosure form? Does she have offshore accounts? His answer, to be fair, obviously adds more questions to what turned into a very suspect mea culpa.

DaTruth is, blaming da Clerk for his own obvious mistake was not only a mistake, it was also childish and completely 1000% disingenuous, and we can guarantee could become political fodder that can be used against Mayor Andy Boy and his running mate, Jordan "Stu" Maskowitz. Da reason -- if "Big Oops" made a big mistake on this one issue, what else in his past has he not disclosed?

What ever happened to "TRANSPARANCY IN GOVERNMENT?"

And, you know da silver haired silver shovel guy won't be da only one who will be looking to see if "Big Oops" didn't forget anything else he may or may not have disclosed.

Our embedded sources within da Cadre believe this is not da first thing that could come back to haunt da GOP'ers that will have "Big Oops's" name on it. We believe something big will happen during one of da September meetings that will be raised by da Queen or by someone during da open public session that could become very newsworthy.

And, apparently this wasn't all that "Big Oops" made a "Big Oops" on. He also was caught playing what one TruthTeller called "an elaborate Ponzi scheme" with da issue of health care.

Ryan "Big Oops" Green wanted to make health care an issue during a recent meeting. He wants to put a resolution forward that said in effect that Manalapan Township Committeepeople could have a paid salary, or health benefits paid by da taxpayer - but not both.

Of course, that sounds very positive and makes a lot of sense. Already, Farmer Don gets one perk but not da other. Deputy Mayor Susan Cohen refused health benefits when she first took office. Mayor Andy Boy gave up his stipend, but has health benefits. Da Queen gets both and will not give up anything. Now, that sounds like she wants her cake and eat it too. However, to be fair, you haven't heard da whole story.

You see, again to be fair, at least da Queen admits she enjoys taking sips from da public trough. It appears "Big Oops" wanders there in da dead of night when nobody can see.

Ryan "Big Oops" Green decided he too would make a political statement. He's keeping his stipend, but he says he will not have da taxpayers of Manalapan pay for his health benefits. Sounds great. You'd want to vote for a guy like that.

Only problem --- Big Oops says he will not have da taxpayers of Manalapan pay for his health benefits. However, you may not realize it --- BUT YOU ALREADY DO!

Da reason Big Oops can boast that he doesn't want YOU DA TAXPAYER of Manalapan to pay for his health benefits is because he gets his health benefits from his wife. She works for da state -- and gets state taxpayer paid-for health benefits that extend to him - da state plan is da very same plan Manalapan Township workers get - including "Big Oops.". Meaning ---- YOU ALREADY PAY FOR HIS AND HIS FAMILY'S HEALTH BENEFITS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ironically, it was da Queen herself who made that point clear during a recent Manalapan Township meeting, saying "he (Green) gets his state health benefits plan paid for by taxpayers!"

Meaning --- much like leaving something off his financial disclosure form, he tells da residents he didn't take state health benefits from da Township of Manalapan - because he already gets them free from da state!

And, adding insult to injury here, it was of all people da Queen herself who drove that nail into da pine box.

DaTruth is, this entire situation of "Disclosure-Gate" is something that has to make you seriously wonder about da honesty of not only "Big Oops," but also his handler, Mayor Andy Boy. Lord Lucas didn't come out against Big Oops, or say anything about it. His silence on da matter could be construed as an endorsement of Big Oops's actions. If that is da case, one might suspect da Manalapan Democrats could use this as political fodder - along with "Disclosure-Gate" in da upcoming election against Lord Lucas.

Da questions are - will they - and what else do they have up their collective sleeves? And, is this da only thing they believe they have on Big Oops?

And, you'll want to check out an upcoming issue of daTruthSquad, because we're researching what Lord Lucas and former President Bill Clinton may have in common, and if "Big Oops" will become Lord Lucas's "Waterloo."

And that's daTruth.

Monday, August 9, 2010

"Alliance" Battlelines are Being Drawn

While it seems very quiet on da "alliance" front, behind da scenes there's been some activity ever since da political marriage of Republican Andy Boy and Democrat da Queen was sent to divorce court.

DaTruthSquad's GOP'er sources check in and say that they're still celebrating New Years Day at GOP HQ. Not only is da GOP in Manalapan now in a position to gain a solid everybody-taking-orders-from-da-same-person majority, but they are now poised to gain a stranglehold on da Manalapan Township Committee. From what we can put together, there is da appearance that this may have been da long term plan all along.

Ironically, what it would take for da GOP'ers plan to work is someone who could be easily duped. They also needed someone who could control others, and maybe even be a "bad guy." They also needed someone who thirsted for power. Never in their wildest dreams did they think that person would be da Queen.

Or was it?

It was actually back in 2004 that da Manalapan GOP started to wonder if da late Joltin Joe was da kind of guy who could follow orders. They were right to realize he was not, because he was his own person and could not be placed under da thumb of anyone, much like his mentor, da Mosked Man.

After da GOP'ers gained power in 2005, da Cadre immediately went to work in ways of "dividing and conquering" da dynamic duo of Joltin Joe and Andy Boy. They were able to eventually divide da duo, and da alliance was born.

This leads us to what will happen next for da Manalapan Democrats who for da first time since da 1990's are now on da outside looking in. Da Andy Boy - Green Hornet duo is on da very same page, which is exactly da way their handlers want things. Their third wheel, Jordan "Stu" Maskowitz is a shoo-in to be elected, thanks to da Democrat's Capo di Tutti Capi, da Boss of all Bosses Gerry "One Bourbon - One Shot & One Beer" Ward putting up two virtually unknown candidates to take on a sitting mayor and a leader of da Manalapan Yorktowne Club. Then again, can you remember da resources da two GOP'ers da Grand Poobah put up against da Queen and Farmer Don received?

Outfoxed by, of all people, Andy Boy and his handlers, da big question now is what will da Capo do, and what will da Queen of Manalapan do to combat what is now turning into GOP dominance at their expense?

DaTruthSquad's embedded sources within da Cadre's walls have been working on this, and here's what we're seeing:

ISSUE 1: WHERE'S DA MESSENGER?

Without a certain former BaconHead Award-winning alleged "reporter" pushing da Snoozepaper's buttons, da Cadre's public relations machine is missing a few cogs. Actual real-life reporter Mark Rosman is not one to be duped into writing whatever, so that option is out. Da so-called "Hate" website is about six eggs short of a dozen, so even placing out those controversial lawn signs from a so-called "mysterious benefactor" didn't help grow da blog either - nor did trying to sell it last year. It seems da only way to make a statement may be during public sessions in Manalapan Town Hall meetings. Their best messenger is da former mayor known for his silver hair and silver shovel.

Could da guy with da shovel be da one to dig up dirt on Mayor Andy Boy??????

ISSUE 2: PUBLIC COMMENTS.

Da days of spending 20 or 30 minutes sitting at a table and taking aim at committeepeople is over. Da 5-minute rule is not only enforced, it is now gospel. Recently, a former mayor went up to ask questions, and da look on his face when he was told his 5 minutes of fame were up was priceless. If da Cadre is going to employ da same "divide & conquer" strategy, they'd better learn how to do it in less than 4 minutes.

ISSUE 3: DA QUEEN'S SUDDEN LOSS OF CLOUT.

Da Queen is da face of Manalapan Democrats, and she is also da face now of two well-known and polarizing lawsuits filed against Manalapan Township, one by da Mosked Man and da other by his client, highly decorated and popular Manalapan Police Chief Stu Brown. Thanks to da alliance, all of da Queen's allies became all of Andy Boy's alies, and now that he's holding all da cards and his side's power is on da rise, it leaves those "allies" deciding what side to be on in these tough economic times. For maybe da first time since she entered politics, da Queen may be on da outside looking in. And, if da unknown Democrats that da Capo has placed against Andy Boy and "Stu" Maskowitz lose, then da Manalapan GOP stands just one election away from an unstoppable 5-0 supermajority.

ISSUE 4: IS DA CAPO NOW POWERLESS?

When you have power-sharing, you at least still have power. When da other side Pearl Harbor's you, and makes enough inroads to swipe away enough allies to weaken your position, and da face of your party is facing legal issues from two highly publicized ongoing lawsuits, and, lets not forget, da issue that vaulted you into power - stopping da Village - is now not going to be stopped and your own party cast da deciding vote to approve it, well it appears that both credibility and power may be in short supply.

So, what is da Capo to do? One thing he doesn't want to do is think about this --- his GOP'er counterpart, Da Grand Poobah - got da better of him!

DaTruth is, da abrupt ending of da alliance has left da Manalapan Democrats more vulnerable than they could have ever imagined. If da GOP'ers emerge victorious this year, then what of political appointments, including those political supporters at da WMUA and their free health benefits? Committees within da township? Jobs like township attorney and others? Even Tara Tiara?

We are now just 90 days away from da election that could keep Andy Boy in power and guarantee him at least one more time as Manalapan's mayor. We could only guess that da Green Hornet wouldn't mind his picture on da mayor's wall of shame. This means that da Capo has just 90 days to find a way to get his base energized, get out da vote, and somehow with da GOP holding all da cards, make them look bad enough to get people to vote against da sitting Mayor and a big wheel in da now-popular Yorktowne Club.

While he's at it, maybe da Capo can also leap tall buildings in a single bound?

DaTruth is, whoever gave da order to end da alliance did so at da perfect time. There may not be enough time now for da Capo to mount any offense against da GOP and his new arch-nemesis, Andy Boy and his "Gray" handlers. What da Capo will need is a "scandal," however, he will need to find one or create one that doesn't touch anyone on his side of da political wall, and that could be tough.

What might da Cadre be planning? If anything, they are plotting and planning now. If they try anything, daTruthSquad believes it will happen in late-September or October, trying to impact da election.

As for what they are planning - daTruthSquad's embedded sources believe da Cadre's plan of attack wlll focus on health benefits da Green Hornet and Andy Boy receive. However, what we are hearing is it will not end there. While they are being very silent on this, it is believed they are working on something else that could impact Andy Boy's election chances. Da question is, can they find it, can they get their message out, and will it be enough?

Da Cadre could also be waiting for a bombshell expose courtesy of daTruthSquad that could blow da lid off da upcoming election. We'll let our embedded sources work on that. Until then, expect both sides to be operating silently during da dog days of summer, and even September too, unless da shovel guy digs up something.

And that's daTruth.