Da Commissar & da Queen's Latest Fleecing of Manalapan

Interesting how it is in da Kingdom that it takes a few meetings to spend millions of YOUR TAX DOLLARS on a piece of land that almost half of which cannot be built on - but when it comes to da Village, which could have implications of actually LOWERING YOUR TAX RATE, a few politicians decide it will take at least 7 years, if ever, to figure out what to do with that - and even then, it could wind up in court that YOU WOULD PAY FOR.

With that said, apparently da latest fleecing of Manalapan is taking place on February 25 at da next Manalapan Township meeting.

One of da ordinances up for bid that YOU DA TAXPAYER will be forced to pay for is in effect DOUBLE DA PRICE for what has become known as da Tillis Tract purchase, or da "Tillis Folly."

Now, please follow below this simple logic, and see if it makes sense to you:

Let's just say, for da sake of argument, you owned a 1.31 acre piece of land in da Kingdom of Manalapan that you wanted to sell, valued at da latest assessment at $238,800. It also had a huge estate on it, valued at da recent assessment at $515,500. According to New Jersey tax records, da home & hand were assessed at $753,300 for calendar year 2009.

Now, da "Queenly salesperson" says she wants to sell that property - ALMOST HALF OF WHICH has DEP issues and CANNOT be allowed to be built on - for, oh, lets say $5 million dollars. You, of course, hearing that reach for da nearest air sickness bag. However, da Queen, seeing you hurling chunks, says while twirling her mustache, that you can instead get that same property for, oh, lets say, $2 million dollars. Da "Queenly salesperson" then says to you, "Hey, c'mon, look at that savings - a $5 million piece of property for $2 million? That's a bargain!"

Or is it?

Ten years ago, a company called Providence Corporation paid $450,000 for a 25-acre tract of land in da Kingdom of Manalapan - and get this --- 40% of that land is wetlands and cannot be built on or touched! Providence Corp told Manalapan's political elite they want $2.5 million for the property, which includes all those wetlands that can't be touched.

Doesn't that sound familiar?

Both sides could not agree on a price.

Doesn't that sound familiar?

They go to court.

Doesn't that sound familiar?

Former Mayor da Queen says that Providence Corp wants $2.5 million for the property, so at $1.5 million, you da peasants of Manalapan are getting a good deal at $1.5 million!

Of course, this raises some pretty interesting questions.....

QUESTION 1: At da most recent assessment, da land that da Queen and her Gang of Three want to buy with your money was assessed at exactly $864,000. Why are some members of da Commissar's Politburo willing to PAY DOUBLE what that land is worth?

QUESTION 2: Is there any plan in place on how to utilize that land after it is bought for double da assessment price with YOUR TAX DOLLARS?

QUESTION 3: Is this a worthwhile endeavor during what has become da worst recession since da Great Depression, and with New Jersey's budget problems on da state level getting worse?

QUESTION 4: What is da real reason for this land grab?

Well, since you can expect not one of these answers getting answered by da Gang of Three at da next meeting, let's put our "Grand High Exalted Mystic Ruler of da Kingdom" hats on and take a crack at them.

ANSWER 1: When you look deep at this deal, there is a "Lynch" connection in there somewhere. Having a "Lynch" connection in any deal is like yelling "He's Wearing a Wire" in a political organization back room. It sounds cool, but it could be a very real & serious problem. However, this question is best answered in Question 4.

ANSWER 2: Da Gang of Three has proposed a number of plans, from a "Tennis Bubble," to houses, to just leaving the space open. Finally, it appears that da 25-acre piece of land, in which only 14 acres is actually usable, may be used for "Rec Center Expansion." Ironically, in da past few years, da Rec has already been expanded, using da land along Route 522 for building da now-infamous "Field of Nightmares" crumb-rubber field - da same type that New York City wants banned, Connecticut and other states are severely questioning, and some countries said "no way" to for health reasons.

ANSWER 3: Hmmmm, lets see. Spend millions of dollars on a project with no plan, when credit is tight, and home foreclosures are rising, and municipal taxes in Manalapan have soared 42% in just 2 years, and da current state budget has nearly a $3 BILLION deficit, and higher taxes and less money to municipalities has already been proposed, and no end in sight, and even pundits are saying da worst is yet to come? I guess if you're a Gang of Three member, put this all together, and da timing couldn't be better!

ANSWER 4: DaTruth. Ask yourself this question - "Why would you pay double for what something is worth, putting yourself deeper into debt, and have no plan to use that something once you purchase it?" If you can answer that question, without being unethical, criminal, or just plain in need of mental evaluation, then you deserve a chance of being on da Manalapan Township Committee. This is something NOBODY can figure out using ethical standards, moral values, an abacus, or a Ouija board. Will Manalapan face a lawsuit if they don't pay? Yes, but that situation has happened before, or should daTruthSquad dare to say, is still happening, as a part of da Mosked Man's "Land-deal-gone-bad-First Amendment lawsuit."

DaTruth is, no matter how much anyone protests, da final vote will be 4-0 with 1 abstention - and that is a daTruthSquad guarantee.

Da bigger question is this - before da vote, demand exactly what da Gang of Three plan on doing with this land. Don't be too surprised if da answer is, "We don't know." If da answer is, "Expand Manalapan Rec," then ask if da Gang of Three's master plan is to expand Manalapan Rec so there is only a park where Manalapan once was, because while a park is nice to have, having no infrastructure with da park is like building a gas station and not budgeting space or money for gas pumps. Manalapan has one of da least business bases in da entire state, meaning you pay more and neighbors in Monroe, Old Bridge, and Freehold get more bang for their municipal tax dollars than you da Manalapan peasants do.

Oh, and by da way, wouldn't "expanding a park" look real good on some "I'm running for political office" election brochure?

Could that be YOUR TAX MONEY at work?

Apparently that's OK for folks like da Gang of Three, who get free health benefits and refuse to part with them despite all having white collar jobs. Being a peasant, that shouldn't be OK with you. Demand accountability from da Gang of Three. Just don't expect to get any.

And that's daTruth.