Thursday, December 31, 2009

DaTruthSquad's Predictions for 2010

Once again, daTruthSquad has dusted off our ever-popular Super-Duper-Dusty-Rusty-Trusty-Reliable-Undeniable-Often imitated-Never duplicated daTruthSquad Crystall Ball, and make our predictions for 2010, now that we bid adieu to both Commissar Klauber's & Jon Con-zine's political career and 2009:

In Manalapan, Andy Boy Lucas will become da mayor of da year for 2010, thanks to 2 Democratic votes. His deputy mayor will be Queen Michelle, thanks to his vote, as both will work together to keep their power base secure for another year.

It will only take 30 days for Ryan Green to become disillusioned with da ways of Manalapan Town Hall, and possibly even less time for him to receive some type of scorn and rebuke from a certain former Manalapan mayor.

A flurry of last minute backroom deals by Democrats will happen in the waning days of Jon Corslime's term. Cost for these deals will be over $86 million, bringing scorn from Chris Christie who vows unless they are immediately repealed, he will get that money back from the state in the form of layoffs.

The Legislature will be expecting a state budget of $30 billion. Instead, Christie's first state budget will be $21 billion, with $9 billion being used to cover the current deficit. The Democratic leadership will be outraged when Christie announces a "Fiscal Emergency," ordering a 5-20% wage cut for all state workers, on top of 8,000 layoffs. When the unions object and march on Trenton, Christie scales back some of his demands for givebacks, but orders another 8,000 layoffs.

Municipalities will get aid returned, but at a price. The only way towns get state aid returned is to agree to a complex series of demands, including municipal payrolls reduced by 10%, each town must have a certain percentage of shared service agreements, and towns must actively consider merging.

Christie will also order immediate drastic reductions to Boards of Education, forcing a number of them to merge.

Queen Michelle, ruler of Manalapanistan, fresh off her landslide loss for State Assembly, will run for Freeloader. She will lose by 6,500 votes, while her running mate will win by just 91 votes after 2 recounts.

The age discrimination case brought by Manalapan Police Chief Stu Brown will continue throughout the year. There will be a delay during the discovery portion of the case, after Manalapan balks at the release of minutes from a number of Executive Session meetings and appeals rulings to hand over those minutes well into 2011.

The Mosked Man lawsuit against Manalapan will take bizarre turn after even more bizarre turn. During a Manalapan Township meeting televised, a summons server will come up during the Open Public portion of the meeting, introduce himself, and hand out documents showing both Andy Boy, da Queen, and even one of da Manalapan Legal Dream Team will all be named defendants. Another bizarre turn comes when a citizen, while complaining about da Mosked Man, makes a statement during a Township Committee meeting that da Mosked Man deems a personal direct threat against him. That person is then arrested 7 days later on charges of making terroristic threats, and that person's bail is posted by a member of da Cadre, who is then also named a defendant in da case. It will not be until 2011 when any settlement is even discussed.

Manalapan residents are outraged after they hear da Township Committee's next budget calls for a 13.5% municipal tax increase. It is approved by a 3-2 vote, with Susan Cohen & Ryan Green voting against the increase.

It will rain at Manalapan Day.

Manalapan will make news during the latter part of the summer when FBI agents raid a municipal office. No arrests will be made, and the government will be ultra secretive as to the nature of the raid. However, after the raid, a well-known municipal worker will resign, and allegations that the person was ordered to resign surface.

There will be a contested GOP race for Manalapan Township Committee. It will result in a split GOP ticket. The split also thrusts Manalapan GOP'er Grand Poobah Steve "Iron Girth" McEnery back into the spotlight, and he will survive yet again another no-confidence vote by just one mere vote.

There will be trouble in da Cadre in 2010, after a blog by daTruthSquad is revealed to have inside Cadre information. Ironically, the wrong person within da Cadre is blamed for da leak, and that person then becomes a supporter for da GOP.

Manalapan will be ground zero again for another First Amendment lawsuit. However, this time, when an anonymous blogger is served legal papers, they return da favor, serving them on da person who originally served them, claiming they too were defamed as that person also used an anonymous name to defame da very same person they are suing. When that happens, that same person is served by three others, including da Mosked Man, for defamation -- and, those who are against anonymous writers will be even more outraged when they discover da anonymous writers are being represented by da Mosked Man as their attorney!

Manalapan also becomes known as Monmouth County's traffic nightmare, as Marlboro starts construction of a "Village-type" shopping area on Route 9 within walking distance of Manalapan, Monroe starts building up Route 33, and Freehold expands their businesses on Route 9. Ironically, 14 businesses are forced to shut down in Manalapan due to slow business, meaning even more people must travel through Manalapan to get to shopping areas.

Due to the new census, New Jersey will lose one seat in the US House of Representatives. Due to redistricting, Chris Smith's seat will be absorbed into Rush Holt's district, angering many voters.

Finally, daTruthSquad will, again, break our yearly record for readers, surpassing 2009 totals, which surpassed 2008 totals and 2007 totals and 2006 totals.

Have a happy and healthy and wonderful 2010, and may our troops serving overseas be protected and always in our prayers, and da First Amendment and our Constitution be forever protected by those who wish to do it harm for their own benefit.

And that's daTruth - from daTruthSquad!


Anonymous said...

I bet I know the name of the lawyer who will be exposed for writing anonymously, and his name isn't Moskovitz.

Anonymous said...

Let's hope the next Manalapan lawyer isn't either Roth of Lucas, because that will mean more of the same for 2010 and this town doesn't need that.

We voted out Klauber in 2009. Let's vote Lucas out in 2010 and rid Manalapan politics of another Gang of 3 member.

Curious George said...

Amen to voting out Lucas.

Anonymous said...

I'm voting for Mr. Lucas. He has done a tremendous job in Manalapan and the town will be well served by having him for another 3 years. IMHO

Anonymous said...

My prediction:
Manalapan will be named in a huge lawsuit that includes 12 other Monmouth County municipalities. This lawsuit will have shades of the Moskovitz case. More details to come!!

Anonymous said...


Anonymous said...

Hey Squaddo, you struck a raw nerve on the brillo blog with some folks there about your power base theory. You know what they say about striking nerves. It means you are probably right on the mark. It wouldn't surprise me if they were forced to change their plans because of it.

Anonymous said...

I'd love to know who your source is within their little group. I'd bet Ward and his cronies would absolutely freak out if they knew whose been leaking their inner info all of this time.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...
Hey Squaddo, you struck a raw nerve on the brillo blog with some folks there about your power base theory. You know what they say about striking nerves. It means you are probably right on the mark. It wouldn't surprise me if they were forced to change their plans because of it.

Please look at the agenda (that was posted before the predictions were published) for tomorrow's reorg meeting.

Anonymous said...

Hey Squad,
I posted that Susan Cohen is going to be the new Deputy Mayor and you did not post by comment! Kim Guadagno is coming down to swear her in. What is up with you?!


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Anonymous said...

I guess the expression,KILL THEM WITH KINDNESS< takes on a whole new meaning now.this should be interesting,anday will have to watch his step.

thankyou susan,your the only person on the board without a personal agenda, lets see how ryan does.

cmon ryan.............RUDY,RUDY.....RUDY!

Anonymous said...

Lucas is mayor. But thank goodness Susan Cohen is deputy mayor. That's like checks & balances.

Anonymous said...

Congrats to Susan!!!!!

Anonymous said...

You have to wonder if the Squad made the Gang of Three change their plans at the last minute?

Anonymous said...

Of course he did! Squad also makes the Earth turn on its access.

Anonymous said...

every morning, i thank squad when the sun rises!!