Time For Another Taxpayer-Funded "Study" & Less Common Sense In Manalapan

Recently, one of our TruthTellers was traveling down Woodward Road when on da other side of da road, a reject from da Indianapolis 500 was traveling at warp speed going south toward Route 33. Looking at their speedometer, it seemed like that other guy must have been going a wee bit faster than 35 miles per hour. Unfortunately, and this has been da case even before da road was re-paved, people looking to set new land-speed records have been using Woodward Road as their own personal Raceway Park.

Now, we never claimed to be a Harvard graduate, or have an IQ above 200, or be related to Albert Einstein, but when one car does it, it's an isolated event. When everybody's doing it, it's a problem.

So, what should Manalapan do about this? We'll let you choose:

(A) Have da Manalapan Police add 24/7 speed traps and extra law enforcement to da area to ticket, and potentially arrest speeders.

(B) At taxpayer expense, set up a series of trap doors that will swallow up any cars going faster than 40 miles per hour.

(C) Using F-16 fighter jets, allow the US Air Force to target from the skies any car speeding on Woodward Road and use a Sidewinder missile to destroy da vehicle.

(D) Have da township engineer, whose company has donated to political campaigns in da past, to do another taxpayer-funded traffic study or have a government agency consider for us what to do."

Let's see.....

"C" would be something we could sell tickets for, and probably make a lot of money, but da cost of da F-16 fighter and all those missiles would defeat da purpose. "B" would also be costly, and then someone would have to remove da cars that get caught in da trap door, and that costs money. "A" is both da smart idea, and also one that generates revenue for Manalapan. Then, there's "D," which Manalapan taxpayers should be giddy to know is what da town is considering doing.

OK, maybe daTruthSquad isn't da smartest financial wizard living on Iron Ore Road, but you might think that if you weigh too much, you go on a diet. If your leg is broken, it's probably not da right day to run a marathon. If you have dinner at Jeffrey Dahmer's house, you shouldn't eat da liver & onions. And, if there's a lot of people speeding, then it doesn't take a Princeton degree to come up with da solution to have added police on da road where people are speeding.

Instead, Manalapan has asked da DOT to look into da matter, and maybe think about lowering da speed limit or even banning trucks. While da banning trucks would be a novel idea, remember that if they are banned there, they will just travel along Iron Ore Road instead. That idea will probably make our friends in Englishtown even more unhappy with Manalapan.

Instead of all of this government hoopla and da possibility of even more taxpayer-funded studies, why not just let Manalapan Police Chief Stu brown take a crack at this.

Now, this may sound a little silly, but what if you just place 1 cop car on Woodward Road, and make it a target enforcement area, and start handing out tickets like they're candy? You might be surprised, but da mere presence of da police, coupled with da word of mouth that it may take you 10 hours to get through a day in a Manalapan court if you get pulled over, and we can only guess that people will stop speeding on Woodward Road.

Again, this is mere common sense.

DaTruth is, we don't need another taxpayer-funded study or a government office to tell us what we all know Woodward Road can be a drag strip. We don't need to hire an engineering firm to tell us people tend to drive fast on a drag strip. Simply let da Manalapan Police do what they do best - protect da citizens of Manalapan. They have an experienced and decorated veteran leader, and a staff of fine officers who do their job extremely well. They can easily fix in 3 days what a study would take months (and a ton of $$$$) to tell us. Da Manalapan Township Committee would be better served dealing with other pressing township issues, like da COAH Corner Apartment Building they want to construct on Route 522.

Which brings us to this point --- Englishtown residents are more irate than da Italian-Americans after Larry Roth said "Because I Hate Italians" during a township committee meeting. They don't want Klauber's COAH Corner built - and with good reason. And Manalapan residents shouldn't want this either. A potential 3-story apartment building for an anticipated 400-500 low-income COAH residents is something Manalapan taxpayers will be paying for - in terms of more crowded schools since they will pay far less in taxes, Route 522 looking like da Garden State Parkway in da summer, and da obvious health concern being built on a brownfield that used to house an oil company! Oh, and since Governor Christie wants to abolish COAH, and even Democrats are on board with this, why in da world are Manalapan Democrats demanding this apartment tower be built?

Maybe a visit to ELEC records is in order?????

DaTruthSquad will be keeping an eye on this for you. And, in da meantime, all da TruthTellers should go to da next Manalapan Township Committee meeting and voice their opposition to Klauber's COAH Corner, and get them to vote on stoping this befire it starts. And da fine folks in Englishtown are always welcome at these meetings and should be there too.

And that's daTruth.