Three Words - DUMB & DUMBER - And A BaconHead!

If we have learned anything over da years in Manalapan, we have learned that nothing - nothing is shocking anymore when it comes to the super-geniouses who run da Manalapan Township Committee. At da last Manalapan Township Committee meeting, what we saw with a certain "re-vote" to some is much ado about nothing. To others, it's a shocking display of brain cell "A" not getting a good cellphone reception with brain cell "B."

Da Manalapan Township Committee had to have two re-votes on issues they had already approved completely by party lines. Why - you might ask?

Well, in one, a current member of da Manalapan Township Committee had to now recuse himself because he voted in favor of someone who was a relative to be a PAID employee of a township program!

Can this get worse?

Da person who had to recuse himself is Manalapan's Deputy Mayor!

Can it get even worse?

Of course it can! Da Deputy Mayor in question is Ryan "Big Oops" Green. Now, to be fair, it is possible that da name in question was not familiar to him. It is possible this person is some third-cousin four-times removed. Maybe it is a long-lost uncle? It's not like it was his sister or something like that.

Well, there's a reason we gave "Lyin" Ryan da nickname "Big Oops." Da name he missed on da list of paid workers is that of a person named Amy, whose last name just happens to be Green - just like his! Any Green is listed as a "cluster director" for da summer recreation program - paid $22 per hour. She may be da cluster director, but for Big Oops, this was more like a "cluster %$#@."

Also to be fair, Big Oops said at da meeting that da mistake had two blames - he admitted it was his fault, but also admitted he was of all things - - a victim of da Queen's "gotcha" politics! Seems to us he doesn't need any help from da Queen to get "gotcha'd." Let's face facts - if he can't recognize his own last name on a list of names, do you really want this guy overseeing a multi-million dollar budget made up of YOUR TAX DOLLARS????

And still to be fair, while it takes a big man to admit he missed his own last name on a list of names, blaming da Queen for your "gotcha" like blaming your car for running out of gas.

Then, there's da other "Big Oops" moment, but this one didn't come from "Big Oops." In da other "recuse yourself" moment, one member of da Manalapan Township Committee decided to vote in favor of -- and get this lovers of da recession -- to give himself a massive tax break!

Only in Manalapan!

In this "recuse yourself" moment, this Manalapan Township Committeeman voted to reduce taxes on a farm listed on Iron Ore Road by $13,000 (thirteen thousand dollars!). Now, to be fair, one might think there's hundreds of farms on Iron Ore Road in Manalapan - maybe thousands? It's not like da Township Committeeman didn't realize it was his OWN block and lot number address on da list. It's not like he's also da same person who gained da nickname "Land Grab" for trying to get his newly bought land placed on Farmland preservation so he could get over $1 million in taxpayer money for it. And, it's not like he's DA MAYOR!

Yes, only in Manalapan.

Yes, he voted in favor of a resolution that would cancel all 2011 preliminary taxes for farmland as well as other selected properties with reduced assessments in the township. And double YES - HIS WAS ONE OF THEM!!!!

Now, to be fair, at least he didn't blame this on da Queen also. He took responsibility - but did so knowing that he had three fellow Republicans who were watching his back on this one, so unless "Big Oops Ryan" and his cohorts were fully immersed into a block of ice before da vote was taken, there was no way Land Grab Mayor Andy Boy would be denied his $13,000 tax break.

Da Queen called this during da meeting "As the saying goes, you can't put the toothpaste back in the tube." Well my TruthTellers, cavities and gingivitis is alive and well and lurking in da molars of Manalapan Town Hall.

DaTruth is, everybody makes mistakes. However, are we to believe two elected officials - one a sitting mayor and da other a sitting deputy mayor - had absolutely no clue as to what they were voting on? Did they not read the resolutions prior to voting on them? Did the Township Attorney not raise even a single "red flag?" If they truly didn't know what they were voting on, then why are they in these taxpayer-funded paid positions to begin with? How can you not even recognize da property YOU OWN on a list of property owners who - in this recession - will RECEIVE A MASSIVE TAX DECREASEWHILE ALL OTHER TOWNSHIP RESIDENTS MUST PAY HIGHER TAXES??? And how can you not even remember da name of your own SISTER -- whose last name MAKING MATTERS WORSE just happens to be da very same as yours???? It doesn't take da Queen to raise da red flags here -- you guys did a great job raising them yourselves!

So, let's get this straight in case we missed something --- In da middle of a recession, da Republicans in Manalapan led by da deputy mayor vote to hand a $22 per hour job to his own sister - claiming he didn't see his own sister's name on da list - even though her last name and his are EXACTLY da same ---- and da mayor, who stands to reap over $1 million dollars from da state for his own land he just paid for - and now he's VOTING TO GIVE HIMSELF A $13,000 TAX BREAK????

IS THIS REALLY WHAT REPUBLICANS STAND FOR????

If Chris Christie were still in da investigation business, he'd probably have to buy a house in Manalapan just to cut his commute down to investigate all of this.

DaTruth is, in less than two months of his new administration as mayor, you have a mayor giving himself a HUGE $13,000 tax break, and not even knowing his own deputy mayor voted for his own sister for a paid town job! And - to make this even more attractive to Grand Master Vic and his Monmouth Democrats, da very mayor voting to cut his own taxes before recusing himself is also running for Monmouth County Freeloader!!!!!!

You can't even come close to making this stuff up.

Due to all of this, daTruthSquad calls on Land Grab & Cut His Own Taxes Mayor Andy Boy to cancel his proposed campaign for Monmouth County Freeloader. This is an embarassment to da Republican Party, da town of Manalapan, and anyone who pays outrageously high property taxes in New Jersey! It's time you show us you can actually do da right thing.

With this in mind, we have to hand out a February BaconHead Award. If da vote were last week, odds are a certain Manalapan Democratic Municipal Chairman had a great chance of winning, but in Manalapan, BaconHeads can change in a Manalapan minute.

So, without further ado....... For voting his own sister to a paying job in town, then saying he didn't realize his "oversight" before he blamed someone else's "gotcha politics" for his not being able to recognize his own sister's name who just happens to share his OWN last name on a list of names, and being da town's deputy mayor which obviously sets a great example for both da residents and da young people, we have to hand this month's coveted BaconHead Award to none other than Manalapan Deputy Mayor Ryan "Big Oops" Green!

And that's daTruth!

We Told You So - Welcome To Ward Island!

Well over a year ago when we first said there were serious chinks in the armor of da Manalapan Democrats, there were some who said we were "making up lies," and even worse. Hate to say we told you so.

We criticized da leadership. We said there were issues between da Queen and her latest running mate. We told you da Manalapan Democrats were facing da distinct possibility of being shut out of Manalapan government in less than one year. We even said there could be some differences of opinion between some people on da dredded "Hate" chat site involving Lawrence of Manalapan.

Welcome to Ward Island - population --- SHRINKING FAST!!!! Hate to say we told you so.

Here are da issues:

ISSUE 1: FARMER DON PLOWS OVER DA QUEEN!

In three elections, da Queen has had three different running mates. Since losing in 2004, there have only been limited sightings of Running Mate #1 Beth Ward. One was nearly getting into a fight at a Township Committee meeting with another woman during da dredded "Because I Hate Italians" fiasco and the other was last year making serious news during "Land Grab-gate." Running Mate #2 Mr. Anthony Gennaro left da Manalapan Democrats during da "Because I Hate Italians" fiasco because of circumstances surrounding da participants. Now, Running Mate #3 is jumping on his tractor and driving away from da Queen before his term in office is over.

Farmer Don is not going to become an Independent however. He's announced his intentions to not just join da Manalapan Republican party, but he wants to be on da ticket and go up head-to-head against da Queen! Da 2011 Manalapan Township Committee elections haven't even started yet, and now they're turning into da biggest election since 2004!

DaTruth here is - for Farmer Don to take this type of action means he is either spiteful and vindictive, or he seriously believes da Manalapan Democrats are severely out of touch and wants nothing more to do with them and their leadership. Since anyone who even remotely knows Farmer Don knows he isn't spiteful or vindictive, then you have to at da very least surmise that either (A) he was told do something he didn't want to do, (B) he can too easily see da corruption through da trees or (C) he came to da conclusion that da Manalapan Democratic party as it is with its current leadership simply wasn't for him anymore, and da best way to change it is to defeat it.

ISSUE 2: MANALAPAN DEMOCRATS ON ATTACK!

We've said before da Manalapan Democrats were having issues. We've been saying that for years. Eventually da flies catch up to da manure truck, and in this case it took a bunch of years but those flies have reached their nirvana. Where once a united Manalapan Democratic party could do no wrong with a 5-0 supermajority on da Township Committee, it got whittled down to 3-2 thanks to da great politicking of da late Joltin Joe Locricchio, and before you could say "Sue Da Mosked Man" da Republicans took over with a slight majority that just became huge with da defection of Farmer Don, who brought his wife Wanda for da ride.


In da past several years, you had Mr. Anthony Gennaro bolting da Democrats over an issue that came directly from Roth Island, da highly respected and decorated former Manalapan Chief of Police suing not once - but twice over issues that were created on Roth Island, add to that one for Manalapan Rec leader, a decorated symphony conductor, a former Township Administrator, a former Township attorney, da First Amendment lawsuit, and all da hyjinx that has made Manalapan a laughingstock - all coming on or through Roth Island, and you have all da ingredients to make even da most loyal Democrats wave da white flag and defect.

DaTruth is - and this is simple math - too many ill-advised lawsuits they couldn't win + too much waste of taxpayer money + too many good people being under da Manalapan Democratic bus + last year's spectacularly unqualified candidates + da Queen's and "One Bourbon's" Waterloo at da hands of Land Grabber Andy Boy and his handlers = a recipe for disaster.

ISSUE 3: FARMER DON'S "PRESS RELEASE"

All you need to do is read this quote attributed to Farmer Don to know that da once powerful team of Manalapan Democrats can now eat from da same pizza with slices to spare.

"The decisions I make are always based on what’s best for our residents. I don’t believe in the petty bickering or partisan politics that permeates the Manalapan Democratic Party. I want to focus all of my energy on making Manalapan an even better place to live, and the members of the Republican Party share that mindset."

Sentence 1: "The decisions I make are always based on what’s best for our residents." This sentence can be taken two ways - (1) Farmer Don wants to do what is right for da people he was elected to serve, and (2) Da Manalapan Democrats don't give a rat's hind region about what is best for town residents.

Sentence 2: "I don’t believe in the petty bickering or partisan politics that permeates the Manalapan Democratic Party." Unfortunately for "One Bourbon" and da Queen, there is simply no "Gray" area here. In this sentence he specifically points da blame at da party leadership using da words "bickering" and "partisan politics." In effect, he's calling out da leadership and showing that backroom deals and one-upsmanship has destroyed da Manalapan Democrats, and he's spent too much time on da bus and this is his stop.

Sentence 3: "I want to focus all of my energy on making Manalapan an even better place to live, and the members of the Republican Party share that mindset." In another slap in da face of da Queen and Gerry "One Bourbon - One Shot & One Beer" Ward, da respected Farmer Don simply says that he had two choices - work with da people who want what is best for da town or work with da people who care only about themselves. We all see who he picked.

ISSUE 4: DEMOCRATS FLEE WARD ISLAND!

Da defection by Mr. Anthony Gennaro was probably da "first strike" but is miniscule in comparison to Farmer Don's dissing da party. Farmer Don was da shrinking team's white knight. Now that da white knight rode off on da horse he rode in on - and galloped at high speed to da enemy GOP'er party and da Democratic-hated Land Grabbing mayor - it leaves not much at all for da Democrats to hang their hats on.

It seems as if ever since BaconHead Award-winning intrepid reporter Cathy Barratta left da Snoozer, Democratic press release alleged stories haven't been able to get into print as easy. And, ever since Chatty Cathy decided to side with Land Baron Andy Boy on at least one key issue against Lawrence of Manalapan, even her chat room is looking more Republican.

Da massive loss of "Da Township of Manalapan vs Da Mosked Man" lawsuit hurt both da Democrats and da town's credibility. Da First Amendment case some say was da prime reason both da mojo and da credibility was taken from da Manalapan Legal Dream Team and handed da victory to da Mosked Man.

"Because I Hate Italians" was never forgotten, and neither were da cases against Chief Brown that backfired directly on da Manalapan Democrats.

Put all of this together, with questionable leadership from Ward Island, two spectacularly unqualified candidates in last year's election, starting and losing easy-to-lose lawsuits, taking on an opponent in da Mosked Man for all da wrong reasons, heavy-handed tactics against some respected folks on da township payroll, and you can see why Farmer Don put his tractor into overdrive and shifted gears to da Manalapan GOP'ers.

ISSUE 5 - WHAT COMES NEXT?

This one may be too easy to call.

(1) With da Manalapan GOP'ers holding a 4 to Roth majority, da Queen's tenure for da rest of da year will make da way she treated Mr. Anthony Gennaro during his last two years on da committee seem like a catered picnic at Manalapan Rec. Embedded GOP'er sources say da GOP'ers plan for handling da Queen will be to simply ignore her at every turn. No matter what she says or does, ignore her.

(2) With Farmer Don running as a GOP'er, he will be paired with a member from da Yorktowne Club which will again mean victory for da GOP'ers and cement da Yorktowne Club as da political power base for Manalapan.

(3) If she even runs for reelection, look for da Queen to pair herself with a well-known someone from Covered Bridge. She will use da "what has da GOP'ers done for you lately" line to rouse them up, coupled with a few surprises to get their votes which she will need to avoid a landslide loss.

(4) We believe it is very possible there could be da potential for a power play for da leadership of da Manalapan Democrats.

(5) At da end of da day, Manalapan GOP'ers will hold a 5-0 super-majority come January 1, 2012.

(6) Manalapan Mayor Andy Boy will run in a primary for Freeloader this year - and lose.

(7) Oh, and Chris Christie will run for President in 2012.

And that's daTruth.

Big Brother Is Coming To Manalapan?

We've seen more than our fair share of people running red lights along stretches of Route 33. However now you may not get away with it - whether you actually went past the red light or not. That's because Big Brother is coming to a traffic light in Manalapan soon.

In what could be a boon to we da lawyers, Manalapan will soon be adding some of those controversial cameras to the intersections where it is believed many people speed through red lights like there were no lights there at all. To be fair, if anyone breaks da law they should be held accountable, whether they are a politician or not. However, these Big Brother devices could come with a cost.

In other towns and cities where these little boxes debuted there has been some controversy as to their accuracy. A split second could be the difference between traveling through town to do your shopping in Freehold or getting at least a $75 dollar ticket for seeing the light being yellow and thinking you could make it through.

Also in other towns, there have been concerns over da possible number of rear end accidents because people fearing da Kodak Moment that hit their brakes at da last second.

However, here in Manalapan, big brother will soon be calling several a few street corners home as those cameras are being readied to be installed. Da good news is it will create a new revenue stream for da town which we do need, since Manalapan still ranks at da bottom of da list for ratables in da county, despite what we hear to allegedly be a new super electronics store of da PC Richard type and variety and two other big box stores coming soon to an Epicenter near you. Da bad news is that new revenue stream could be coming directly out of your pocket -- if da camera actually works right.

Da next question is - where will they be installed? Will they put one at da traffic light outside Covered Bridge? Will one go at da end of da block where Manalapan's Land Baron lives? Will they go near schools or along Route 9? We'd be curious as to where they go -- and who decides that if it not da police who know best.

DaTruth is, da fine folks at da Manalapan Police department do a fine job of patrolling Manalapan roads. Adding these cameras could potentially be da prelude to getting rid of a few officers in town. And, as we've all seen, taking cops off da streets in Camden and Newark and other towns has not been da best for keeping crime statistics low.

However, daTruthSquad also has good news about Manalapan's men and women in blue.

Thanks to some excellent detective work by da Manalapan Police Department, two boils on da buttocks of da world were arrested after police began dealing with a bunch of break ins at Covered Bridge. Da two young hoodlums that were busted, one of whom is a Manalapan resident are believed to be behind da recent rash of robberies, at least seven of whom may be charged to these young adults who we can only surmise truly make their parents proud. DaTruthSquad has been told by confidential sources that while these two alleged senior stalkers may be collared for as many as seven of da crimes where everything from jewelry to money was taken, many other robberies may have gone unreported and police are still actively working that angle.

DaTruthSquad has been told da un-dynamic duo allegedly posed as Covered Bridge workers to gain access to homes while their victims simply let them through da front door under da guise of doing some maintenance work. Once inside, they helped themselves to da goodies of those senior citizens.

Now, things like this don't just happen in Covered Bridge. Just because someone has a name tag doesn't mean you should let them into da house. If you have any questions, just refuse anyone you have concerns with entry until you know for certain they belong. If you think its a bag guy, call da police.

Kudos to da fine folks at da Manalapan Police Department for working hard and going da extra mile to catch da bad guys. You can credit their hard work to da legacy left behind by former Manalapan Police Chief Stuart Brown, who despite accepting a settlement from Manalapan's Legal Dream Team for da age discrimination lawsuit he filed, is still fighting to get his immaculate and great name and reputation back as he pursues a defamation case against certain members of da Manalapan Politburo - which will of course like many other cases before it be paid for by da great taxpayers of Manalapan.

And, if you're wondering why Land Baron Andy Boy became mayor for a second year, maybe it's because da rumor mill is working overtime about a potential run for County Freeloader? Will Andy Boy run for Freeloader with Little Lil? Will someone on da Manalapan Politburo have something to say about that? Don't be too surprised if an upcoming daTruthSquad has more to say about that.

And that's daTruth.

Social Networking & Sewer Rats - And Yes - A BaconHead

Ten years ago what is happening in Tunisia and Egypt, and maybe other places in the Middle East soon enough would never have happened. Tyrants and dictators ruled with an iron fist. Even though many still do, the youth and impoverished of those nations now feel empowered thanks to a little thing called the Internet and something called Facebook and Twitter.

Ironically, many in the Arab world may owe their freedoms to an American kid with the last name "Zuckerberg."

People have used these sites to organize, to plan demonstrations, and get their messages out faster than ever. It seems tyrants can't keep up with technology.

Before Facebook became what it is, we had bloggers. People who didn't have millions of $$$$$ to own a newspaper instead had a computer, an idea, a message and internet access. Many people and organizations have blogs. Despite naysayers they are still as popular as ever, take for example the respected blog "MoreMonmouthMusings." Blogs are the new newspapers - places you can get information sometimes much faster that maybe a newspaper can't supply, or believe things are "non-starters" when they are really news to people affected by it.

In 2007, this very blog was under attack, not for yelling "Fire" in a crowded theater, but instead for actively discussing a legal case certain small town politicians didn't want to have discussed outside of very closed doors. We openly discussed it, and we were then threatened with legal action for it. We had two options - stop blogging and let those who want to eliminate da First Amendment rule the day - or stand up to da bully who wants our milk money.

We stood up.

Not only did we stand up, we also set a legal precedent that stands today in our great nation. Already, it appears our legal challenge to da taxpayer-funded Manalapan Legal Dream Team and da precedent it created has already been used in court in a similar successful legal challenge. But, it also did something even more important.

There are some who even dared say that it was da inclusion of daTruthSquad into this case that threw da big monkey wrench into da plans of da Manalapan politicians and their Legal Dream Team, making da case unwinable for them and handing victory to da Mosked Man.

Our successful challenge threw a huge monkey wrench into da plans of da politicians and da taxpayer-funded Manalapan Legal Dream Team's case against da Mosked Man. After 25 months of taxpayer-funded challenges, da taxpayer-funded Manalapan Legal Dream Team realized they had no case whatsoever and was basically forced to end their legal farce against da Mosked Man. However, this doesn't end here.

Failing to agree on a suitable conclusion, da case now continues, not as "Da Township of Manalapan vs Da Mosked Man" but instead as "Da Mosked Man vs da Township of Manalapan." Now, da Mosked Man is going after da very people who went after him, and don't be surprised if da taxpayer-funded Manalapan Legal Dream Team settles this case out of court for more money than da Mosked Man would see in 5-10 years.

Yes, my TruthTellers - arrogance does come with a price - sometimes a taxpayer-funded price.

Which brings us to da Manalapan Sewer Rats.

This month, da GOP'er dominated Manalapan Township Committee under da leadership of Land Baron Mayor Andy Boy had a patronage opening to fill on da Manalapan Sewer Authority. Who did da GOP'ers decided to make a paid-commissioner of da WMUA? Did they pick an engineer who knew something about waste treatment? Did they pick a management pro who has experience with aquatic engineering? Did they pick someone who ate too many spicy burritos and knows how to flush a toilet? Or, did they pick someone who is da defacto leader of their political party?

If you picked "D" for defacto, you are correct.

Da person they chose to be a paid commissioner complete with cadillac health benefits was none other than Manalapan GOP Municipal Chairman Steve "Iron Girth" McEnery!

Even more ironic -- this type of choice is da very rationale that Governor Chris Christie is flushing out in Passaic County. Maybe Christie should look at Manalapan's WMUA as a place he can also clean up.

To be fair, if a then-Democratic-dominated Manalapan Township Committee led by da Queen had made Manalapan Democratic Chairman Gerry "One Bourbon, One Shot & One Beer" Ward or Mr. Michelle Roth da new commish, can you imagine da outcry from Andy Boy and his cronies complaining to anyone who'd listen about cronyism at its finest?

DaTruth is, da pick of Iron Girth wreaks of cronyism. But that's something they'll probably have to deal with in November when da Queen and da Democrats makes that part of her platform.

As for this year, Manalapan like many towns who have depleated or will soon their yearly snow budgets will be facing serious budget issues. Should it be fair that Manalapan taxpayers and toilet flushers have to foot da bill for political party crony commissioners whose job is to oversee a sewer system? Maybe its time that da Manalapan GOP follow their leader Chris Christie and abolish da sewer commissioners and do away with da cronyism - and da salary and cadillac benefits that come with it.

And - remember that Manalapan Township already has a government liason at NO COST TO TAXPAYERS whose job it is to be the go-between between da town and da WMUA --- Land Baron Mayor Andy Boy! If you need proof - check out da town website as of January 10.

Or, Land Baron Andy Boy can do one better -- prove Christie wrong! Why not make commissioners for other things in Manalapan, and place his friends and $$$$ supporters into those positions at taxpayer expense!

Maybe Manalapan should create da "Commissioner of Yorktowne Shopping Center" and put da person who was Andy Boy's political campaign treasurer in place with a salary and benefits? Maybe one of da heads of da Yorktowne Club can be da new "Commissioner of Route 33," and pay him and give him benefits too. You can always nominate daTruthSquad as Manalapan's "Commissioner of Bloggers" - but to be fair, we'll decline because we don't want to take hard-earned taxpayer money. We'd much rather win a lottery, or win at da poker tables, or win a lawsuit first brought against us.

This, of course, brings us to da always popular and always fun BaconHead of da Month!

Congratulations are in order for da very first BaconHead of 2011! For accepting a job that comes with a salary and cadillac benefits - and for having as da qualification for being nominated for this position da resume that includes "Political Party Boss" and "Leader of Republican Election Campaigns" - we at daTruthSquad boldly hand you da BaconHead of da Month to none other than Manalapan Republican Municipal Chairman / Paid Sewer Commisioner Steve "Iron Girth" McEnery!

DaTruth is, you can take it from somebody who has served da people at one time - There is no need for 4 commissioners who suckle from da public trough when you already have peopleon town governments whose job it is to do da very same thing - oversee and report back! You can wither follow Republican Governor Chris Christie's lead and do away with political patronage jobs for da sake of padding political friends pockets - or admit you don't have true Republican values and stand aside and let someone else do what is right "For All Da People!"

It's time that citizens of Manalapan attend meetings, and demand from their political Republican leadership that they do what they preach and rid Manalapan of political party patronage. We call on da Manalapan Township Committee to demand da WMUA remove all so-called "Commissioners" from da public and private dole. We already have town "liasons." We don't need politically connected people suckling from da public trough. Da citizens deserve nothing less!

Be honored, and place this BaconHead Award next to da picture of da toilet flushing. And that's daTruth!